I tried to even. But I can’t.
Y’all adulting is really really hard. Maybe I am a whiner, maybe my barely millenial status makes me immature and soft like all those think piece articles say. Maybe it is my social media use and how no one instagrams their boring grocery trips and only their fancy dinners so I really do feel like I am the only one who does things in a boring not so picturesque way. Maybe it is that the instagram filter of “fine” leaves the clutter of kids and jobs and simply existing just out of the frame of conversation. Maybe I am doing it all wrong. But I have been looking, and I can’t find an easier way to do life.
Maybe, adulting is actually really hard.
Who knew? Who knew that this normal thing that everyone is doing every day, going to work, feeding the kids, putting them to bed, getting up and doing it all over again would just be so….draining.
I speak from the experience of a working mom because that is what I am. But I think everyone has their own set of circumstances that make their life just really difficult sometimes. Longings not fulfilled, relationships that are complicated, coping mechanisms we probably need to unlearn. I don’t care who you are, if you are a person it is probably all too much sometimes.
Then you add things like being there for each other, holding people in our hearts, chasing our dreams. Holy moly. That is a lot. How do you pick up the groceries when your hands are already full? This is the thing I need to know.
Sometimes life throws pieces at you and before you know it you are juggling what can only be described as allthethings plus. Plus a sick parent, a divorce, a move, an unsold house, a dream that won’t let you go…..whatever it may be and life is just too much. It is hard enough to just get up and brush your teeth, now the world wants you to do the laundry and not even give you credit for it. What do you mean I am just supposed to do it because I am an adult? Heck yes I want credit for it!
When I was in elementary school it was the cool thing to do to reply, “oh do you want a cookie” sarcastically when someone announced something you thought wasn’t impressive. And I always wondered about that because, HECK YES I WANT A COOKIE! Why would I not want a cookie? Or a gold star, or some tiny sliver of recognition that YES! Adulting is super hard, and you my friend ARE KILLING IT! Or just making it through even though you are carrying more than you ever thought you could. You are doing this. You are adulting. You are even-ing, even though you feel like you can’t, YOU ARE!
That feels brave to me. It feels important that you went to the grocery store, fed yourself, got your kids to school, AND THEN brushed your own hair, worked on your dream even a tiny bit, let everyone know your real self even if it was just on Facebook. That junk is hard and YOU DID IT!
Stop beating yourself up because you ordered pizza twice this week. You manged to feed everyone every single day. That is a lot, even if it was just yourself. Maybe you did pull your clothes out of the giant pile you have dubbed Mt. St. Laundry, HEY! You are wearing clean underwear! You remembered to wash your clothes even though you were so tired you could not remember your middle name. Wow. You do need a cookie, or maybe a glass of wine. Or both.
I know. It is hard. You can’t. You can’t even. But you did! You did even! And might just even tomorrow.
Life is hard. Adulting is hard.
Here. Have a sticker. Or a cookie. Or a quarter of a key lime pie after you put your kids to bed. You know. Hypothetically. Adulting is hard, and you are doing it.